I recorded last week's lottery and, knowing the result, bought my wife a ticket for Wednesday's draw.
When she thinks she's won she'll have a heart-attack.
That'll get her back for burning my toast.Submitted by: giorgiss
So a Scottish couple have won 161 million on the Euromillions...
Unlucky Greece, better luck next monthSubmitted by: giorgiss
My wife told me if she ever won the Lottery she wouldn't give me a penny and she'd move out of the country.
Little does she know I've been using the same numbers as her for 5 years.
That'll wipe the smile off her fat faceSubmitted by: giorgiss
The Euromillions winner has not come forward yet.
No surprise there; I'd still be telling my boss what I think of him.Submitted by: giorgiss
I don't think I'm ever going to win the lottery.
I can't even pick the pen that works from a choice of two at the lottery stand.Submitted by: giorgiss
"BBC NEWS - Colin & Chris Weir - 161 MILLION POUNDS!"
They also won the lottery you know?Submitted by: giorgiss
"We don't want to hire unlucky people!" said the interviewer and randomly discarded half of the applications.
Submitted by: giorgiss
After winning the lottery I thought, the first thing I'm going to do is fill my car with fuel.
Then that dream was shattered as they announced that there had been two lucky jackpot winners.Submitted by: giorgiss
If I ever win the lottery, all of my neighbours are going to be so rich!
I'm going to move to a rich neighbourhood.Submitted by: giorgiss
In Nigeria, how do you know if you've really won the lottery?
Submitted by: giorgiss
