It looks like my daughter takes after my wife.
Recently her weight has nearly doubled.
I mean, only a few months ago, she was seven pounds four ounces.Submitted by: giorgiss
All the bad weather means a walk in the woods with the wife and kids is out of the question, so I've decided to take them to the Museum of Transport in our town.
It should be fairly easy to lose them there.Submitted by: giorgiss
My wife's just left me because she was fed up of my constantly optimistic approach to life.
She'll be back though, i just know it, and we'll be together forever and never be unhappy.Submitted by: giorgiss
'Happy Birthday Google!' My Dad screamed down the phone..
I hung up and instantly burst in to tears... I wish he could get my birthday right one year!Submitted by: giorgiss
Money can't buy you happiness. But it can buy you divorces. Good enough right?
Submitted by: giorgiss
After months of killing myself in the gym I emailed a photo of my new body to my girlfriend's iPhone. She replied stating she was unable to view it.
Turns out the definition wasn't high enough.Submitted by: giorgiss
My mother in law drowned yesterday
Apparently she isn't a Witch after all.Submitted by: giorgiss
We have some good news and bad news Mr Hughes.
The good news is you get to spend more time with your family this Christmas!Submitted by: giorgiss
Every Xmas the family likes to play charades. Our Nan tries to be as accurate as possible meaning her basic instinct is not such a highlight.
Submitted by: giorgiss
This is England'86 aka This is Burnley.
Submitted by: giorgiss
