Scientists have discovered sausages can cause cancer!
If you're daft enough to smoke 20 sausages a day then it's your fault.Submitted by: giorgiss
I saw the song "Dirty Talk (Clean Version)" on Spotify
So normal talking then?Submitted by: giorgiss
When I asked my Dad what he wanted for Father's Day he pulled himself up in his hospital bed and whispered,
"Son, I know it's a big ask, but the one thing you could give me is a kidney."
"Not a problem," I replied without hesitation. "You know I'd do anything for you".
"Bless you son", he responded, tears running down his cheeks as he pulled me close enough to hug.
God knows how I'm going to break it to him that the butcher's was closed when I visit him this evening.Submitted by: giorgiss
There's a new foreign guy who's just started at work, who all the girls are going mad for.
I went up to the office fatty, and asked "So, do you fancy Emile?"
The tubby cow said, "Well, I've just eaten a McDonald's, but yeah, why not?"Submitted by: giorgiss
flying is simple. You just throw your self at the ground and miss.
Submitted by: giorgiss
Abu Hamza has said he wants Muslims to "follow Osama Bin Laden"
I agree, they should be deadSubmitted by: giorgiss
It's offical, June was the wettest ever.
Does anyone know where she lives,I'd loved to meet her?Submitted by: giorgiss
I stopped celebrating as soon as I realised I'd misunderstood the news my girlfriend broke to me earlier.
...I thought she meant Spears.Submitted by: giorgiss
It's not like I killed her.
If anything she should be thanking me!
At least now she can park anywhere she wants.Submitted by: giorgiss
We stopped at one of those 'Pick your Own' farms today and were allowed to fill a basket for five pounds.
Bargain. Even if it did take us 4 hours to chop that cow up.Submitted by: giorgiss
