Jokes in category: “work”:

My last job interview did not go well.
The guy asked me to show him my testimonials.
Next thing I know I'm being escorted off the premises.

Submitted by: giorgiss

I don't know what is the hardest part of a job interview.
Memorising the job description or memorising all the lies you wrote about yourself in the application form.

Submitted by: giorgiss

Everyone in my office was really hot this afternoon.
I probably shouldn't have had that fifth beer at lunchtime.

Submitted by: giorgiss

The manager of a large office noticed a new guy one day and told him to come into his office. "What's your name?" the manager asked.
"John," the new guy replied.
The manager scowled, "Look, I don't know what kind of a namby-pamby place you worked at before, but I don't call anyone by their first name. It breeds familiarity and that leads to a breakdown in authority. I refer to my employees by their last name only - Smith, Jones, Baker - that's all. I am to be referred to only as Mr. Robertson. Now that we got that straight, what is your last name?"
The new guy sighed and said, "Darling. My name is John Darling."
"Okay, John, the next thing I want to tell you is..."

Submitted by: giorgiss

I just got a job helping a one arm typist do capital letters.
It's shift work.

Submitted by: giorgiss

My boss is always onto me for being late in work.
I make up for it though by leaving early.

Submitted by: giorgiss

I've just been fired from my job as a Sinatra lookalike........
Just not good enough, to be Frank

Submitted by: giorgiss

What do you call a bunch of black guys on an oil drilling platform?
Riggers.

Submitted by: giorgiss

I met my new boss today.
She said, "I want you to know I'm a feminist."
I replied, "That's great, I hate women too."

Submitted by: giorgiss

Boss: Why aren't you working?
Me: There's nothing to do.
Boss: Well, pretend that you're working.
Me: Wouldn't it be easier if YOU pretended I was working?

Submitted by: giorgiss