How come all the supposedly homeless people in London seem to be sleeping in doors?
Submitted by: giorgiss
Advice for enterprising tramps and homeless. Invest in a card swipe machine for those awkward occasions when your target 'doesn't have any change' on them.
Submitted by: giorgiss
Just walked out of the shop and tramp approached me and said, "Have you got a spare cigarette?"
I said, "Hang on a minute, mate," as I took a full pack from my pocket and opened them...
I said, "No, mate, there's only 20 in it."Submitted by: giorgiss
I saw a tramp today who had a rough beard, torn clothes and long dirty fingernails. I could smell him a mile away and he looked freezing. Totally helpless he was, I felt sorry for him.
Glad I'm not like that, I'd hate to be in his shoe.Submitted by: giorgiss
A beggar asked me today if I had any spare change.
I told him that I was sorry and that I'd left it at home in my spare wallet.Submitted by: giorgiss
There's an old trampy guy who lives in a battered old shed near me. He's always smiling.
The other day I said to him, "What's the secret of happiness, mate?"
He said, "Throw away all your possessions!"
I said, "How can that make you happy?"
He said, "I need your telly and video for my shed!"Submitted by: giorgiss
Walking through town today and my girlfriend said she felt sorry for all the homeless people.
I thought "Get a grip. Look how much money they save on house insurance"Submitted by: giorgiss
Apparently Premier Inn's now got a franchise that caters for the homeless as well.
it's called Premier Out.Submitted by: giorgiss
Top Tip- Big Issue publishers, help the homeless by giving them something to sell that people might actually want to buy.
Submitted by: giorgiss
I like to do my bit to help get the homeless off the streets...
A couple of laxatives in their meths usually does the trick.Submitted by: giorgiss
