Escalators never break down, they just turn into stairs
Submitted by: giorgiss
I had a soft drink while catching up on the ironing.
It was soda pressing.Submitted by: giorgiss
I recently bought 51% of a vampire hunting company.
I'm now the main stake holder.Submitted by: giorgiss
I work as a waiter.
The pay isn't great but I put food on the table.Submitted by: giorgiss
I was driving around the industrial estate in my Land Rover and saw a sign on the roundabout advertising a "4 x 4 specialist" so I pulled in.
Apparently, the answer's 16.Submitted by: giorgiss
My girlfriend wanted perfume & jewellery for her birthday but I got her a chocolate egg & a toy instead.
She was kinder surprised.Submitted by: giorgiss
My wife started yelling at me because I shaved my head.
I tried to explain it was because my base jumping instructor told me to, but she just said "If he told you to jump off a bridge, would you do it?"Submitted by: giorgiss
It seems google news feed definitely has a sense of humour given I woke up to this:
"Remains of british tourist found in Lebanon - Yahoo!"Submitted by: giorgiss
My mate said the drink I bought him tasted funny.
It was a cheap shot.Submitted by: giorgiss
I hate French jokes.
They're crpe.Submitted by: giorgiss
