I get very excited and turned on by women in boots.
Which is why I'm banned, and now I have to buy all my toiletries in Superdrug.Submitted by: giorgiss
I've just heard on the news that currys can cure cancer.
Well that's definitely one in the eye for Comet, who only sell fridges and TVs.Submitted by: giorgiss
I was in Sainsburys when I saw the sign saying "try something new today".
So I did and went to Asda.Submitted by: giorgiss
So Jordan got attacked.
Seriously though, isn't that just like shoplifting a free sample?Submitted by: giorgiss
Just read a woman's open letter to her car thief in the Metro,
I hate to break it to you love, but if he's got your car, he's probably not reading a newspaper you get on the bus.Submitted by: giorgiss
I think Volvic represents excellent value for money.
No matter how many times I refill my empty bottle from the tap, it always tastes just like Volvic.Submitted by: giorgiss
I'm fed up with shops that give false promises:-
You can't buy a curry at Currys
You can't buy boots at Boots
And Superdrug has always been a big disappointmentSubmitted by: giorgiss
I was standing in the queue today in Asda and a voice announced, "Checkout number 45, please."
I've seen better.Submitted by: giorgiss
I got into an argument with this thug in the pub. Anyway, I backed away, but as I was leaving he shouted, "I know where you live."
I was really worried for a while, but it turned out he works for Royal Mail Parcelforce, so his threat almost certainly isn't true.Submitted by: giorgiss
Marks and Spencers has announced they are in financial trouble. They have merged with Poundstretcher.
They will now be known as Stretch Marks.Submitted by: giorgiss
