Just got back from my holiday in France, everyone there was friendly, polite and co-operative.
Typical French, refusing to live up to their comedy stereotypes.Submitted by: giorgiss
The West Bank. The favourite holiday destination of Reverend Spooner.
Submitted by: giorgiss
My New Year resolutions this year are to gain a ton of weight, start smoking, never volunteer, emotionally distance myself from friends and family, and be completely closed-minded about everything.
That way, next years resolutions should pretty much write themselves.Submitted by: giorgiss
I was at the beach when I saw a bloke with a donkey and a sign reading "Rides from 2.50"
So I paid my money and jumped on.
We got about halfway down the promenade and I was loving it. I didn't want it to end but he said he had to get back to his donkey.Submitted by: giorgiss
What's worse than going on holiday to Mordor?
Butlins.Submitted by: giorgiss
I went to Blackpool on holiday and knocked at the first boarding house that I came to.
A women stuck her head out of an upstairs window and said 'What do you want?'.
'I'd like to stay here'
'Ok. Stay there'Submitted by: giorgiss
Oh I miss being a kid. Listening for the big fat red guy, eagerly awaiting his bulging sack to be unloaded all over. Of course then my uncle would go home and then we got excited about Christmas.
Submitted by: giorgiss
I arrived back off my holidays yesterday and I couldn't find my luggage at the airport baggage area.
I went to the lost luggage office and reported the loss. The blonde behind the counter smiled and told me not to worry because she was a trained professional and said I was in good hands.
'Now,' she asked me, 'has your plane arrived yet..?'Submitted by: giorgiss
Getting my mother in law to accept the free holiday was easy!!
The hard part is convincing her that dignitas is swiss for "spa"Submitted by: giorgiss
I turned to my mate and said, "You know, there should be a World Bacon Day."
"That's brilliant!" He said, "It'd be like having two Christmases in one year!"
"I know, something else those filthy Jews can't celebrate."Submitted by: giorgiss
