My daughter was really upset when she found out her new gold earrings were only gold plated.
Not as upset as I was, they're leaving a green rash on my thighs.Submitted by: giorgiss
When I was six I was a bit of a knife addict. I was also an only child...
...eventually.Submitted by: giorgiss
I coach a schoolboy football team. In today's match, and the very last kick of the game, our goalkeeper let the ball through his legs and gave away the goal that cost us the match.
After the game he came over and said, "Sorry, coach, I should have kept my legs shut."
I said, "It's not your fault, Jimmy. It's your mother who should have kept her legs shut."Submitted by: giorgiss
Want to enjoy your holiday but the kids are too noisy around the pool?
Try putting the armbands on their ankles, it works everytime....Submitted by: giorgiss
A young boy asks his Dad, "What is the difference between confident and confidential?"
Dad says, "You are my son, I'm confident about that. But see your friend over there? He is also my son. That's confidential."Submitted by: giorgiss
A little boy comes running into the house and says, "Mummy, can little girls have babies?"
His mum replies, "No, of course not."
The little boy runs back outside and yells, "It's okay, we can play that game again!"Submitted by: giorgiss
Why did the little girl fall over?
Because I threw a brick at her head!Submitted by: giorgiss
I'm like a God in my Kid's eyes,
They are told that I created them, but they have never seen me.Submitted by: giorgiss
My son said, "What's your biggest regret dad?"
I said, "I'm not sure son... Who's taller, you or your brother?"Submitted by: giorgiss
What do you call a man with twin teenage daughters?
Mate.Submitted by: giorgiss
