I saw a black couple on the news who had been jailed for beating their child and I thought, "Wow, I'm so glad my parents weren't like that... or I'd be black"
Submitted by: giorgiss
What's the difference between Batman and Madeleine McCann?
Batman returns.Submitted by: giorgiss
Whenever my young son cries too much, I show him his birth video in reverse and tell him that's what happens to kids who don't stop crying.
Submitted by: giorgiss
My son invited his posh friend to his birthday party.
I asked him, "What's your favourite game, Tarquin?"
He said, "Partridge, but I'm partial to grouse in season."Submitted by: giorgiss
When my boss asked me why I was leaving so early,
"I'm going to pick the kids up before their parents get there," was not the answer I should have given.Submitted by: giorgiss
I was asked by my local community center to play simon says with the kids. According to the parents Simon does not say take off your clothes.
Submitted by: giorgiss
I had to take my son to the emergency room today after my attempt at teaching him to ride a bike went wrong. In retrospect, I probably shouldn't have started with a Kawasaki Ninja.
Submitted by: giorgiss
I hit my nephew yesterday....
My sister was absolutely hysterical..
but then I was in an Audi and he was playing in the driveway.....Submitted by: giorgiss
Little kid fell in the hole I dug in my garden, when he hit the bottom there ws a splash from the water below. Couldn't help but think, Oh well.
Submitted by: giorgiss
I don't know if i'm a bit sick; but when you're out shopping, does no one else find it funny when distracted toddlers walk into things...
...like the roadSubmitted by: giorgiss
