After a long and costly legal battle, I found out you're unlikely to be granted custody if they're not your children to begin with.
Submitted by: giorgiss
My 5 year old son just invented a brilliant reusable tissue!
He calls it his tongue.Submitted by: giorgiss
Premature greyness is hereditary.
You get it from your kids.Submitted by: giorgiss
With babies, they say breast is best.
I don't mind which part I eat as long as there's gravy.Submitted by: giorgiss
'Children need to see disabled people on TV to get over their fear' says one-armed presenter Cerrie Burnell.
On the other hand... oh wait.Submitted by: giorgiss
BBC NEWS HEADLINE: 'Sterling hits 19 month euro high'
So what your saying is, Old man hits druggy baby.Submitted by: giorgiss
My baby nephew has been really whingy and whiney since he got rubber on his arm from the tread making machine at the michelin factory tour.
He's just tired.Submitted by: giorgiss
There was a little boy who had just learned to count on his fingers. One day his uncle came around to visit and the boy was anxious to show off his newly acquired skill. He told his uncle to give him a addition question, so the uncle asked "What is 3 plus 4?" The little boy counts it on his fingers and says "Seven" The uncle said , "Listen kid, you can't count it out on your fingers because some day when you are in school, a teacher will get mad at you for it. Now put your hands in your pockets." So the boy puts his hands in his pockets and the uncles says "Now what five plus five?" The uncle seen movement in the boys pockets, then the boy answered, "Eleven"
Submitted by: giorgiss
The other day I was in the process of buying a pair of nike shoes, when a man came upto me and said:
"Are you sure you want to buy a product that a small indian child was forced to make for the equivalent of 5p?"
I replied:
"Somebody has to employ them."Submitted by: giorgiss
I love dog owners. Always happy to let you have a good old stroke of their beautiful dogs when you ask.
Can't say the same for parents, mind...Submitted by: giorgiss
