I was looking inside my computer yesterday and I burnt my finger on my processor.
It Mhz.

Submitted by: giorgiss

Just bought a Wii fit in a sale, and lost 90 pounds instantly.

Submitted by: giorgiss

My sister warned me the other day that the police are cracking down on illegal downloads and that I should delete all my songs just in case.
Yeah, if the cops seize my P.C, illegally downloaded music'll be the least of my worries.

Submitted by: giorgiss

Remember days before computers?
Memory was something you lost with age
An application was for employment
A program was a TV show
A cursor used profanity
A keyboard was a piano
A web was a spider's home
A virus was the flu
A CD was a bank account
A hard drive was a long trip on the road
A mouse pad was where a mouse lived
And if you had a 3 inch floppy...
You just hoped no one ever found out!

Submitted by: giorgiss

Windows: "You may be the victim of software counterfeiting..."
Me: no Microsoft, it is you who is the victim of software counterfeiting here, not I.

Submitted by: giorgiss

Why is there so much "i" everything?
iPod, iPad, iPhone etc...
One day my children might grow up to think that an idea is some form of digital antelope.

Submitted by: giorgiss

.'
I just went for a slash and missed.

Submitted by: giorgiss

There was once a young man who, in his youth, professed his desire to become a great writer.
When asked to define 'great' he said, ''I want to write stuff that the whole world will read, stuff that people will react to on a truly emotional level, stuff that will make them scream, cry, howl in pain and anger!''
He got a job with Microsoft, writing error messages!

Submitted by: giorgiss

Why are Facebook status updates like a Polish builder's toolkit?
All the good ones have been stolen from another site.

Submitted by: giorgiss

I'm useless with computers! I'm such a techno-numpty! I only have to touch the things and they break!
Well, not really. But you've got to lie on your CV a bit to have a chance of getting in at PC World.

Submitted by: giorgiss

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