Police officers needed for G20 march duties. Interviews are being held tomorrow. Come early...beat the crowd.
Submitted by: giorgiss
Police: How did your wife get that mark on her forehead?
Husband: She fell down the stairs.
Police: But you live in a bungalow.
Husband: Yeah but she lives in the cellar.Submitted by: giorgiss
Whenever I feel ill enough to make a doctor's appointment, I strangely hope that I stay sick until I see the doctor.
Submitted by: giorgiss
Newsflash!!!
Police have arrested a man for selling pills that will give you eternal youth. Records show that it is the fourth time this man has been arrested.
The earlier arrests were made in 1799, 1852 and 1921.Submitted by: giorgiss
"I know what you're thinking: did he fire six shots or only five? Well, to tell you the truth, in all this excitement I kinda lost track myself but, being as this is a .44 Magnum, the most powerful handgun in the world, you've got to ask yourself one question: do I feel lucky? Well, do you punk?"
"Look officer, I'm not even a protester, I'm just trying to get to Tesco for a sandwich."Submitted by: giorgiss
Doctor: I'm sorry, but you're just too ugly for plastic surgery. I suggest wearing a plastic bag over your head.
Patient: Um don't you mean a paper bag...?
Doctor: Maybe I didn't emphasize how ugly you are...Submitted by: giorgiss
BBC News...."Riot shield sledging PC's told off."
I'm a PC and sledging on a riot shield was my idea.Submitted by: giorgiss
Black police officers...
Fighting crime with crime.Submitted by: giorgiss
I visited the offices of the RSPCA today. It's tiny; you couldn't even swing a cat in there.
Submitted by: giorgiss
If you ever get arrested wait till the cop says "anything you say will be taken down and used in evidence against you"
Then you say this: "please don't hit me again officer."Submitted by: giorgiss
