My Korean mate was going to cook his wife a surprise birthday dinner.
But someone let the cat out of the bag.Submitted by: giorgiss
As I pointed the gun at the baby, I decided to add to the dramatic atmosphere.
I said, "Any first words?"Submitted by: giorgiss
Dwarves are often born with an extra toe.
It's a little gnome fact.Submitted by: giorgiss
Those that say 'As one door closes, another one opens' have clearly never seen an episode of Takeshi's Castle
Submitted by: giorgiss
My Chinese mate always tells the truth.
Believe Yu-Mi, he never lies.Submitted by: giorgiss
I've learnt so much from my mistakes, I'm actually thinking about making a few more.
Submitted by: giorgiss
After a day in the sun, sea and sand with my wife, it ended in the best way possible.
She drowned.Submitted by: giorgiss
Incompetence is officially at its lowest level since records were lost.
Submitted by: giorgiss
Here's hoping I never get any splinters.
Touch wood.Submitted by: giorgiss
I get annoyed when retailers insist on charging 99p, or 9.99 for products.
I usually tell them to 'keep the change' but they get very angry. More often than not, they throw me out of the shop.
In fact, if I had a penny for every time it happened, the situation could be avoided altogether.Submitted by: giorgiss
