I can't write jokes, but a friend of mine gave me a foolproof formula.
He said "Start with a natural set-up, lead the audience in one direction, then hit them with a punch line they weren't expecting."
So here goes:
Walk forwards.
Turn left.
Pasteurisation.Submitted by: giorgiss
What's worse than a joke without a punchline?
Submitted by: giorgiss
The problem with maths jokes is not the jokes themselves, but that if you get them, you don't have any friends to tell them to.
Submitted by: giorgiss
Sickipedia's motto - If you can't beat them, copy them.
Submitted by: giorgiss
I was in the work canteen the other day and started shaking salt all over my chicken. My work colleague looked over and said, "Would you like some chicken to go with that salt?"
I replied, "Would you like some laughter to go with that joke?"Submitted by: giorgiss
I just got kicked out of my local Laser Tag and the police were called.
Apparently knifing somebody to save ammo is not allowed.Submitted by: giorgiss
Apple has a new device out for Chinese people.
The iOpenerSubmitted by: giorgiss
My first joke on here was like my first girlfriend...
They were boring, annoying and it lasted about 10 minutes before they both got buried.Submitted by: giorgiss
Don't call me in the middle of our text conversation and say, "This will be faster."
There's no doubt in my mind that it will be faster, possibly even easier, but I had no desire to speak to you.
Hence the text.Submitted by: giorgiss
Jonathan has a bag of sweets. There are 13 Red Sweets, 7 Green sweets and 15 Blue sweets. Jonathan takes a sweet at random, notes it down and then returns it to the bag 10 times. What is the probability that:
a) Jonathan will select 5 Green sweets?
b) Jonathan will select only Blue sweets?
c) Jonathan is bullied?Submitted by: giorgiss
