I was in the pub when a guy called me a cheapskate.
So I threw his drink in his face.Submitted by: giorgiss
My wife asked me, "What did you buy me for my birthday?"
"Well," I chuckled. "You see that pink Mercedes over there?"
"Yes," she said happily.
"Well I bought you a toothbrush the same colour."Submitted by: giorgiss
Whatever you do, always give 100%. Unless you're donating blood.
Submitted by: giorgiss
Arrogance isn't attractive.. But I am.
Submitted by: giorgiss
I came across this on Wikipedia before.
'This limb disfigurement article is a stub. You can help Wikipedia by
expanding it.'
Who said wikipedia has no sense of humour?Submitted by: giorgiss
My wife and daughter are leaving because of my obsession with horse racing.
And they're off!Submitted by: giorgiss
I was telling a funny gag in the the garden today, but the punchline was greeted with silence.
Later on, my brother told the same one in the lounge, and the room erupted with laughter.
I think it was an inside joke.Submitted by: giorgiss
Sometimes I like to wear green trousers and a blue t-shirt and hide on the horizon.
Submitted by: giorgiss
Ever noticed that all ghosts are White?
Yeah, it looks like a good afterlife, doesn't it.Submitted by: giorgiss
I'm currently working as a computer games tester making 50 pounds a week!
By that, I mean I'm on the dole...and I play a lot of Xbox.Submitted by: giorgiss
