I invented a time machine but it only takes you back in time.
The guy in the patents office couldn't see any future in it.Submitted by: giorgiss
I've just crashed at eighty miles an hour into the office of a large financial advisors' company.
The car went straight through the window at the front, halfway through the building and came to rest at the Capital Investment desk.
If I was travelling eight miles an hour faster, I'd have gone all the way back to the Futures.Submitted by: giorgiss
I was recently asked to name a couple of time periods, to which I answered "present and future".
The rest is history.Submitted by: giorgiss
I've invented a time machine that automatically brings you back to the exact moment you left.
I'll just try it again to make sure.
Yep, it works.Submitted by: giorgiss
My mate Dave said he had to give up his time machine experiments, he tried going back 10,000 years and then went forward 10,000 years in steps of a 1,000.
He said " I can't understand it, nothing ever changed! All the people and buildings just stayed the same."
I guess Africa wasnt the best place to run the tests afterall.Submitted by: giorgiss
The inventor of the time machine has tragically died in a car crash, next week.
Submitted by: giorgiss
Raoul Moat has just been found by police. He was in Shannon Matthews's uncle's bed base!
Submitted by: giorgiss
The clocks go back tonight. Problem is, im not sure where they came from
Submitted by: giorgiss
I'm really into those oversized watches.
Big time.Submitted by: giorgiss
I was reading the paper in the Barbers today.
Can't believe it's only 4 months till Christmas.Submitted by: giorgiss
